my heart this christmas

I've mentioned in previous posts about how your heart changes around Christmas time when you become a mom, I think it's inevitable.

I view Mary's role in the Christmas story so much differently now than I ever did before. As a mom you've experienced carrying and birthing a child. To think of Mary and the fear she must have had as a young girl carrying not only a child but the son of God. On top of that, could she really understand and comprehend how this baby got inside her in the first place? And the fear she must have felt telling Joesph, knowing how much she loved him and fulling expect him to leave her. And then there's the actual birth itself and not having anywhere to go. I mean imagine that - feeling your contractions and the pain you experience as you get closer and closer to the delivery of child and being on a back of a donkey! Now I know things were a bit different back then, that hospitals (as we know them) weren't an option but she wasn't even in a warm and safe place - not in a home or in a bed - but riding on a donkey. They had to have been absolutely desperate to find some place, any place. And they must have been to settle for a barn! Another thing I absolutely can not imagine. Now we all know I can be a little high maintenance :) but to think of giving birth in a stable surronded by animals, hay, the whole works - unbelievable! But Mary did it - because she had to, because she was called by God, because she didn't really have a choice - did she? And then the joy, the absolute relief, and the pride that she must have felt in herself and in Joesph - the man that stayed by her side through it all - as she held that little baby in her arms. Jesus. What would it feel like to look into the eyes of Jesus as a baby? Did Mary feel the same as I felt when I felt my baby girl? I think she did. I think she felt that instanteous unconditional love for her child. But I wonder if she felt more because of who He was.

I've played a Christmas song on repeat this year, over and over. It's by a good childhood friend of mine, Alli Rogers and its called Adorn. The lyrics just touch me so deeply. She sings about the birth of Jesus and wonders how the mountains could stay standing and how the rivers could still run. Could our hearts really be ready to hold the holy one? Such powerful words and so absolutely relevant and true. How could everything on this Earth not just stop and pause? She goes on to sing "I like to think there was a pause, I like to think there was a silence" But was there? The reality of it is that there probably wasn't. The world probably went right on about it's busy self. Does anything in this world ever just pause? The moment my baby was born I remember that pause and that silence in my heart as I looked into her eyes for the first time, but did everyone else pause and/or be silent, no. The nurses carried on, the doctor completed her job. But was it the same for the Savior of the World?

Here's her lyrics and the link to listen on youtube. Thanks Alli for writing such a deeply moving song and for speaking so clearly to my heart this Christmas through these words.

I like to think

there was a pause

I like to think there was a silence

when all the wind stopped blowing

all the trees bowed low

sharing in a secret

there must have been a million stars

that must have shaken at the moment you arrived

how could the mountains stay standing

how could the rivers still run

did the earth fall before you

how could our hearts be ready

to hold the holy one

how could we ever adorn you?

the voice of God

in a babies cry

sometimes I wonder how it sounded

and all the angels listened

bet they all came down

wish I could hear that chorus

there must have been a million songs

written at the very moment you arrived

how do you clothe the one who hung the stars

warm the hands that wrought the sun

how do you lift a child in your arms

He who carries everyone

Written and sung by Alli Rogers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JhAUVdPTUqE

santa

This past weekend we took Lily to visit Santa. Jimmy gave me a hard time as I was getting her all dressed up, making sure I knew that this was a lot of work for just 1 picture. But you have to do it for their first Christmas, right?!

She wasn't really sure what to think of him. At first I don't think she even noticed that someone else was holding her, then once she did she just looked at him for a little bit then just sat there. Unforunately we didn't get a great picture of her smiling - but we got a few to document her first visit. Enjoy!

all ready to go

complete with a visit to grandma's

7 months

On Saturday our baby turned 7 months old!


Putting away this last batch of clothes is the first time I've actually been sad in realizing how fast she really is growing up. She is learning new things every day and each stage seems more fun than the last.


This last month she has learned so much. She started eating food and loving it. We held off on feeding her any food until 6 months and she has done great. We started with rice cereal and bananas. Since then she has had sweet potatoes, carrots, avocado, apples, pears, puffs, and yogurt. Her favorites are banana and yogurt.


She still fits in some 6-9 months but is mostly wearing 9 month and 12 month clothes. She really didn't gain any weight this month, weighing in at 20 lbs 6 oz and not sure of her length, but I can definitely tell she is getting longer but not much heavier. But don't worry she still has the chubby legs and cheeks that we love to koose on!!


Other fun things she's learned this month is sitting up from her back, rolling around like crazy, standing up on things, waving, playing "piano", curling her tongue, moving in her crib, pulling up her crib bumper, and "hissing". She enjoyed her 1st thanksgiving and her 1st visit to Santa as well.

I am really looking forward to Christmas with her this year. I wrote a post last year and plan to write another post sharing some of my thoughts this Christmas but I really feel like Christmas takes on a whole new meaning once you are pregnant and/or have a child. The sacrifice God made by sending His only son to die for us is incredible, and I absolutely cannot imagine being in Mary's shoes and birthing the Savior of the World in a barn!

So that's our month in a nutshell - every day we love her more and more and I can't imagine our lives without her.

Lily -
You are the joy of our heart. Your laughter, smile, giggles, playfulness, reaching arms, chubby legs, and sweet breathe (every time I smell your breathe it reminds me of the instant you were put on my chest, it smells the same!) are some of my favorite things. Your dady and I love you so very much and we can't wait to share our lives with you and watch you continue to grow. We pray for you every single day and tell you every day how much we love you and show much Jesus loves you. May you always know the love that overflows in our hearts for you! Happy 7 months sweet sweet girl!

5 things

I got this off another blog I read and thought it was a good idea, so here goes.

You may not know that I

have 2 tatoos (and Jimmy hates tatoos)
have run 5 half marathons and 1 full marathon
played college softball, I was a pitcher
have moved 6 times in 6 years because of my jobs
play guitar

I'm really pretty knowledgeable about

tractors / farming - who would have thought
baseball
excel
everyday fashion
running

I know nothing about

how things work - my husband is completely "wired" wanting to know how things work
and I could usually care less
how to drive a stick shift
techy type stuff and how it all works
movie quotes - when people quote movies I just laugh and pretend I know what movie it's from :)
politics

And I believe

in God and that He truly blesses those that seek Him
that you should always do something you love
that marriage and children are God's greatest gifts to us on Earth
that you should always treat people with respect and kindness
that it's our responsibility to care for those less fortunate, not the government's

bye bye

Someone learned to wave bye bye last night and I caught it on video this morning after she waved bye to Jalissa when she left.

Watching them learn new things is so fun!

thanksgiving

We had a great Thanksgiving. This year we didn't have to be anywhere until noon on Thursday and that was wonderful - it was so nice to relax in the morning, let Lily get a good nap in and then hit the road to spend time with family. First stop was at Grandma and Grandpa Smedley's for a full fledge homemade Thanksgiving feast. Esther is quite the cook and makes everything from scratch - it was so yummy! Luckily I'm not a huge Thanksgiving food fan so I don't have too much trouble passing on some things and trying to keep my plate to reasonable portions. My favorite is Esther's sweet potatoes - so so good. She makes them with sweet potatoes from her own garden and adds just enough sweetness to them to make them delicious but not too sweet. We spent majority of the afternoon catching up with family we don't see very often and had a really great time before heading back to Cedar Falls for dinner at our place with my family! Thankfully our family agreed not to do the whole Thanksgiving spread since most of us were having it somewhere else so we opted for appetizers and soup for dinner. Which made it easy for me to host! We had a small crowd this year as my sister and brother alternate families for Thanksgiving and Christmas and so they were both out of town at their in-laws this year. For dinner it was my parents, my grandma, my sister and brother in law, Jimmy, Lily and I. My mom brought the soup and rolls and my sister brought dessert and salad, and that left me with making buffalo dip and cutting up some fruit - pretty easy huh?! We enjoyed our meal then spent some time hanging out, making our plans for Black Friday shopping, playing some cards, and then cleaning up before hitting the stores.
I love (almost) everything about this time of year - the except to that would be the weather. I love that it's a time set aside to reflect on the blessings we've been given and spend time with family. I love the memories I have of Thanksgiving and Christmas growing up as a kid, and am excited to create traditions with our own family too. I love having some time off work to be with families, I love decorating the house for Chrismas just before, or after, Thanksgiving, I love shopping for the perfect gift for everyone on your list, and so much more. Unfortunately this is always such a busy time of year that it always passes too quickly but I love every minute of it.
I hope you enjoyed your Thanksgiving as well!

with gma grover - lily's face in this picture cracks me up!

family pic

with gma & gpa grover

thankful #26-50

My continued list of thanksgiving - 25 more...........

26. Iphones
27. The challenge of a new project
28. Finding the perfect gift for someone
29. My new leopard print wedges that I've been on the hunt for and finally found
30. An unplanned visit from my best friend this Saturday!
31. Diet Coke :)
32. Biggest Loser because as I watched it while working out last night it inspired me to run 1.5mph faster on the treadmill
33. Hobby Lobby
34. Plans for Thanksgiving that involves family - can you imagine not having anywhere to go or anyone to celebrate with - sad!
35. Christmas at Walnut volunteer opportunities - this is an upcoming event at our church that Jimmy and I are volunteering at
36.  Awesome weather
37.  Afternoon walks with Lily
38. Late night bedroom chats and giggles with Jimmy
39. Pictures to capture memories
40. Putting together our first family Christmas card
41. Wedding shower and bachelorette party planning
42. Realizing your jeans are too big and it may be time to finally buy a smaller size
43. Generous people
44. Our new small group
45. Chunky sweaters
46. Our warm fireplace 
47. Birthdays
48. Making new hairbows for Lily (and others)
49. Finding a healthy version of a favorite not so healthy food
50. My hair rollers and teasing brush

projects

I've been working on a few projects lately. Pinterest, I'll tell you just gets my wheels turning! I also went to a craft fair a few weekends ago and found so many things that were so unique and cool but were so expensive. So I figured, why not figure out how to make them myself? Now of course I'll sell them to you if you are interested in buying them but I promise they won't be at craft fair prices - it's crazy how expensive some things are!


So here's what my creativity has been up to lately.

• Tulle wreaths. This was something I saw at the craft fair and thought was so cute! They had some at a baby booth, with the intent that you would hang them in a kids room or nursery, and then I also saw them in a Christmas booth in Christmas colors with other Christmas decor. So I thought I'd give it a try and I must saw for my first one it turned out pretty good. The first one I did is in pink and black - I was thinking I'd use it for Christmas with a green bow but I don't think it looks too Christmasy so I may use it on Lily's door without the bow since her bedroom is pink and black! Thinking maybe I'll do one all pink and use the green bow for that.

• New bow hanger. Lily's bow board was overflowing. She has tons of bows and I couldn't even see some of them because of the way I had them organized on her board and there was just too many! So I made her one of the bow hangers that I sell with her initial but experimented with a little bling this time and I like it - what do you think?

• Vintage fabric bows. I've seen a variation of this bow in a number of places, including pinterest and the craft show and love them. I had bought the supplies to make these at Hobby Lobby a while back but just hadn't taken the time to do it, until now :) And I LOVE the finished product. I experimented with the number of pin wheels in a cluster and like the bunch of 3, 4, and 5 but I really like the flexibility to mix and match them. These seriously go with so many things in Lily's closet. I also think they look pretty good in big people's hair too - in fact my sister has already put in her order :)

So that's some of the creative things I've been up to lately - I love spending my time creating new things. I wish I had more time to do them, maybe someday.....:)

Let me know if you are interested in any of these things, I'd love to make them for you!

6 months

Lily is 6 months old today - half a year already!


Once again I feel like she has grown so much this past month. Not only in her development but her personality too! She definitely keeps us on our toes as she reachs for everything, we often say "she's always in your business", she is now sitting up totally on her own and really likes to sit up when she plays, she reachs to be held and whines until you do so:), she has started crying when I leave the room :(, she was dedicated at church, she grabs for everything and will wiggle her way out of your arms to get to it, she's been doing lots and lots of rolling over to get things, she's drinking out of her camelback and just recently a sippy cup, and she's started to eat big girl food - we gave her rice cereal for the first time last night and gave her bananas this morning with her rice cereal. We also broke her of the habit of her sleeping in our bed. Not sure if I had mentioned this previously but we found her sleeping in our bed consistently after I had let her a few times when she had a cold and Jimmy was out of town (amazing how quickly something becomes habit). So we did a revised version of letting her cry it out about a week ago and so far so good! She cried for over an hour the first night but the last few nights have been little to no crying and she's sleeping entirely through the night without a feeding or needing her paci put back in or anything - it's wonderful for us all!


Her weight this month was 20 lbs 5 oz and heigh is 28 inches. She's near the top of the charts on both height and weight!


Aside from those things she continues to be such a good, happy baby. Her eyes light up when she recognizes someone she knows, her little arms stretching up for you to pick her up is just priceless, and her baby babble and giggles is such a sweet sweet sound.


It's unbelievable how fast they grow but each milestone is so much fun to witness. I love to watch her discover new things, play with her daddy, wiggle, stretch and squarm until she can reach something, and the way she snuggles up when she's sleepy. She is such a joy and a blessing to us and there's not a day that goes by that I don't thank God for a healthy, beautiful baby.


We love you to pieces baby girl - happy 6 month birthday!

sitting up like a big girl - like the new style of bow i made?!

smiles!

silly grin - this has been a common face lately

boo

checking out the blanket

lookin' like her daddy

thankful #1-25

In light of the upcoming holidays I thought I would help prepare my heart for this season by writing a series of thankful blogs. My plan is to write 25 things I'm thankful for for the two weeks leading up to Thanksgiving. I'm going to omit the common ones because I feel like those are no brainers. We all know how much I love and am so very thankful for my husband, my baby girl, my family and my in-laws. I want to challenge my brain to think about the other things I'm thankful for, so here's my list of thanksfulness for this week:

1. My morning iced coffee.
2. My part time job that allows me to work from home.
3. Baby babble and laughter - is there a sweeter sound?
4. My Women's Bible study.
5. A new friendship.
6. The beauty of a first snow - now you can melt :)
7. Homemade applesauce.
8. The memories created while making homemade applesauce.
9. Movie dates with my mom.
10. A fun night babysitting my niece and nephew.
11. Pinterest.
12. Tomato soup and grilled cheese on a cold and rainy day.
13. Our 2 "nannies" who are so good with Lily and love her bunches.
14. A comfy couch with lots of blankets to snuggle up in at the end of the day.
15. Mid day naps.
16. Watching Lily discover something new.
17. A healthy body that allows me to run.
18. Crockpot dinners that make dinner time a little easier.
19. A new winter coat.
20. Jimmy being home for the last few weeks and no more work trips scheduled for the near future!
21. New receipes that we both like.
22. Lily's sleep schedule and sleeping through the entire night without a feeding or having to get up to put her paci back in!!
23. The anticipation of Black Friday - do you know Target opens at 12am this year?!
24. A childless stroll through Target with a peppermint mocha in hand.
25. Bath and Body Works candles burning all day.

family pictures

My good friend Bailey King has a photography business and was so good about squeezing us in last minute for a mini family photo shoot because I needed a few updated pics for our Christmas card. I had her come to our house because I wanted them to be casual and homey and they turned out great. I think she even commented at one point "are you ok with that crockpot being in the background?" :)


The only disappointment I had was that I had made a "Merry Christmas" banner for us to hold up in some of the shots for something fun and different - well guess who forgot to get the banner out?! I was so annoyed with myself!


I can't post all the good ones because that will take away the element of surprise on the Christmas card but here's a sneak peak!


Thanks so much Bailey - you are so talented and it's been fun to watch this passion of yours grow and turn into a business! We appreciate your flexibility with our crazy family!

applesauce

Last weekend my sister, mom and I spent the afternoon making homemade applesauce with my grandma. Last year we did apple buter and this year we decided to switch it up and do applesauce. I LOVE applesauce so I was really excited. We don't eat much apple butter - not that we don't like it - we just don't eat much bread so I knew applesauce would go much quicker at our house. My parents went to an apple orchard a few weekends ago and brought back tons of apples so that's what we used for our applesauce. The whole process was actually pretty easy - we peeled and sliced the apples, added a little water, a little sugar and let that come to a boil and simmer for a while. The boiling and simmering makes the apples breakdown and become the consistency of applesauce. From there we let it cool off and then put it in our containers. We got about 30 containers of applesauce out of 1.5 buschels of apples. So divided among us we got quite a few containers and I must admit we've already eaten 3 at our house - yummy yummy!

the apples boiling

getting them in containers

sister jacinda

grandma and mom

a month of firsts & giggles

first taste of melon

first solo road trip with mommy to see these guys

sitting up all by myself

first time eating a puff thanks to her friend lily



first swing ride



and double swing ride with friend lily

first halloween

a special day

Yesterday was a special day for us. Yesterday was Lily's dedication ceremony and celebration. As parents Jimmy and I want nothing more for Lily than for her to love Jesus with her whole heart and to be raised in a Christ centered home. He and I believe that as individuals we would fail miserably as parents but with God and the support of our family and friends we will not fail and God promises that He will fill in the gaps where we fall short. Yesterday Pastor Ed said something that really stuck, he said "our children are the most valuable thing the Lord gives us and today you are choosing to give them back to Him." That is exactly what yesterday meant to us.

In preparation for yesterday our church has you go through a little "Faith at Home" class. During the class they share statistics about how much time in days and hours you have with your child before they leave your home (that is if they leave when they are 18 :)) vs how much time they spend with friends, at school, in activities, at the church, etc. and it was truly unbelievable how little time you really have. The idea was that you need to spend that time wisely and teach them from an early age the things you want them to believe and know as truths. So they had us write down what those beliefs and truths were that we wanted them to take with them when they leave us. The things Jimmy and I wrote were:

• That Jesus loves you and is always there for you.
• That we love you and are always there for you.
• That you need to always be kind, humble, respectful and honest and to live with integrity.
• That we are proud of you.

On the other side of that card they asked us to write a short letter to Lily about why we chose to dedicate her and what it means to us. We wrote:
Lily May - we love you and are choosing to dedicate you today because we committ to raising you in a Christian home. We want you to always know that Jesus loves you. We committ that our family will be centered on our faith and hope you will see and understand the importance and can apply that to your life one day too. We love you!

The then they had us choose 1 of 4 verses as our blessing to our child. When choosing the Bible verse we were promising to pray this blessing over our child every day. The blessing we chose is:
"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:14,16

Then all of this went into a frame. The blessing is what is showing and the card with the beliefs and our letter is slid in the back. I thought this was such a neat idea and something that Lily will hopefully always keep with her to remember this special day.

Our promise to her is that she will grow up in a home surronded in our love but also the love of Christ, and our hope for her is that someday she will choose to love Christ on her own.

The card I wrote to Lily sums up my thoughts on the day for her and my committment as her parent. Obviously she can't read this today but someday she will read these words and understand the importance of this committment we made to her. I wrote:
Lily May - Today your dad and I dedicate you to the Lord. Today we declare that we will teach you about Jesus and that you will be raised in a home centered on our faith in Him. We love you so very much and can't imagine anyone loving you more but the Bible tells us that God does. May you grow to know Jesus and love Him just like we do - that is our daily prayer for your life precious girl. As your parens we promise to pray for you daily and love you unconditionally. I love you!

Being a parent changes your heart in so many ways. As I looked at the love surronding Lily yesterday I was so blown away. Some people don't have anyone they can count on for support in raising their child and we have so so many people in our lives that love us and love Lily. She is one blessed little girl and we are so very thankful for the blessing of her and the grace of God in choosing us to be her parents!

in her special outfit ready to go - this is the dress my sister's and i all wore when we were baptized, the braclet jimmy and i bought her for the day, and the blanket was made by her great grandma smedley

checking out mom's bag

us with pastor ed

blurry but the only pic we got of us all on stage

pastor ed & lily

playing with daddy

great grandma davis

great grandpa and grandma smedley

great grandpa and grandma dieken

Silly me forgot to take pictures of her with grandparents and her aunts and uncles that made it!